permutation. noun.
1. a major or fundamental change.
2. the act or process of changing the order of an ordered set of objects
syn. innovation, mutation, vicissitude

--from The Merriam-Webster Dictionary--

...Right... and here I thought the word just sounded cool.

Change huh?

Fics-side-wise: Illusion -- finished with the flavour challenge fics, moving onto the canon and the interlude
L-16 -- iffy about chapter 2, can't move on to chapter 3. Sorry.
Countdown -- lost inspiration. Sorry. Looking for the missing muse right now; have a sneaking suspicion it's hiding under a bathtub somewhere in the Northern Hemisphere.
fanfics of whatever genre -- proceeding as well as could be expected, meaning they are my breaks from writing my original stories.

My room: Almost habitable but seeing as I'm the only one there at the moment, it's perfectly okay for me hehehe threw away some stuff that I'm really regretting but won't admit to out loud coz I've always been of the mind that if it's broken and can't be repaired or totally unsalvageable or totally useless in your life, throw it away. Can't back down on that, now can't I? Especially since I made a big fuss out of that before the room endeavor and during the room endeavor.

My closet: Thinking of giving away some clothes but can't think of how to categorize which to give away and which to keep. There are some things that I really, really like but don't know if I can get to wear again and if the manufacturers will make another set like them. I think I already took care of my shoes before... though my current slippers/sandals just had a connector broken. It's still serviceable.

Why am I doing this again?

Oh yeah, I'm sleepy and want to stay up just on principle.

Gah, have to do laundry... reminder to self... Laundry.


Conversation earlier: I had just gotten up from bed, around nine tonight, and was about to eat dinner. My ever so 'loveable' sister who already ate stood up from her seat in front of the TV and said, 'I'll eat as well.'

Imagine the eye roll from my side.

She goes on, 'I don't know what's up with me; I don't know what I want.'

It was just too precious. So I go, 'Easy. Anything I want.' in a very audible voice.

She goes, 'What was that?'

I didn't reply anymore.

And it's kinda true, from my perspective anyway. Like just this morning, I was wearing jean shorts (I'm brave since it's cold at night) and a black shirt. When she changed clothes, she was in a jean skirt and black shirt. It's happened before.

And when I'm talking to a friend of mine and we were talking about handwriting coz she was copying a recipe of mine, in jumps sister-dear with her own set of handwriting stuff and mentions that her and mine's are similar.

Imagine the shudder. I resolve to maintain my current style and not write in long-hand for as long as I can help it. Heck, I'll go back to my earlier style of all block letters.

Tell me, why is she so intent on pointing out that we're similar? Does she fucking bloody want my bleeding life to live coz her's is already practically over?

And what's with this 'oh during my days...' and 'I did that when...'

For fuck's sake, fuck off!

You and I can't have the bleeding same life experiences!! We're not the same fucking people!! Get that through your thick head and leave me alone!!

This is especially annoying. So she's watching TV and I just happen to come down for one reason or another, either to wait for her to finish watching her shows so I can watch mine or to get a different scene from my room (can get boring with the same four walls staring back at you) or to just plain watch. When she's all alone, she's quiet but when I come down, I get unwanted commentary from whatever she's watching.

Did I ask for it? No. Did I mention that I wanted to know that? No.

I even closed my eyes but she just prattled on. When my nerves couldn't handle it anymore, I just shook my head and as quietly as I came down, went back up to my room.

Did she get the point that I do not need nor want her commentaries nor conversation when watching TV? Of course not. She just prattles on and on and on... annoying really.

It could be that she's lonely and she doesn't have anyone to talk to.

I live in the same house and I don't do that.

There's the telephone, call your friends! There's text messaging! Or go outside and talk with the neighbours!

Gods!

Even when I gave my goddaughter my Christmas present, she just had to be there! I went out the house first coz I saw my goddaughter riding her new motorized tricycle so I thought this might be a good time as any to give the present to her. I went out, chatted with her grandmother who was watching and lo and behold, out comes the sister and jumps in the conversation wagon.

It's like everything I do, she has to do as well, she has to participate in. I must say I'm guilty of the fact that I encouraged that behaviour before since I didn't know any better and didn't contemplate on how encompassing it could be, but haven't I done everything to discourage that behaviour now? That has to count for something!

...That was some rant...